What is stress.  Stress can be anything that puts pressure on a person.  The demands of a job, relationship, home life can be stress.Verbal  and physical abuse can be stress.

     Our fear and anxities can be stress.  Every thing we fear and worry about can cause tension and pressure.  In fact some of us are trained very well by life how to worry and be anxious.

      What we do not understand we fear.  What we fear makes us anxious.  Then, we try to pretend we are not anxious.

      The sad fact is that there is no cure in a bottle.  We would like to think that we should have answers for every problem.  In our modern, world we think these answers should be easy and quick.

      I think it is empowering just to have a handle on what the challenge really is that is facing us.  With time any person can over come their worries.  We just have to realize that most of what we fear is in our heads.

     First you are in charge.  There isn't anyone who controls your emotions.  Even a uncooperative romantic partner does not control your emotions.  We define everything that happens.  In addition, we have the choice to identify it as bad or good.

      One of the strangest things is how hard it is to convince people they are in charge of their emotions.  No ones has a gun to our heads.  There is no human remote control that makes people feel what they do not want to feel.

     Okay, so if there is no invisible force messing with our emotions, then what is going on in our heads?  We all have needs.  When our needs are not met we experience a sense that something is missing.  We also respond to stress with emotions.  Fear and anxiety quickly turn to sadness and depression.  Therefore, what we are feeling is the respond to our stress.  We can begin to feel rage and anger.

     The solution is mixed.  I think first people need to be taught to meditate in order to not let their emotions overwhelm them.  All of us know about counting to ten.  It is  also helpfull to find a quiet place where we you can relax.

      Furhteremore, I recomend people think through what they think is scaring them and figure out if it is a real problem or a made up problem.  We sometimes convince ourselves that there is a problem when there is no problem.  For example, doing a good job, but worrying about loosing our job because we are not doing a good job.