Now I know that a lot has changed. People are more liberal about their sexual practices. Most people this day are having sex before marriage.

I also know that most people are confused about intimacy and romance.

The person you are with is very good at communicating their needs and interest. You may not wish to pay attention or listen to them.

However, this lack of response from you is not going to make their wants and desires go away.

In addition, you have to understand that most people want relationships that are secure and answer their intimacy needs.

People who are in it for only physical pleasure find it hard to meet their partners other needs.

In fact, all relationships will eventually move to a deeper and more personal level.

Now you may say what is more personal than sex. For many people sex is just a sport.

If you are in a relationship with such a person, you are probably going to find it hard to get what you want.

Moreover, we live in a world where you do not have to pretend to be some one just to get sex. There many types of interest and desires in our modern world.

However, some people are immature. They swindle sex from people they do not really care about. Swindling is telling lies just to get what you want.

Do not feel bad if you have been taken advantage by some one like this.

Every day is an opportunity at a new beginning. In addition, I have always said that the way to fix the problem is to understand the problem.

If we where more careful in choosing our romantic partners, very few people could take advantage of us.

In addition, you can tell more about a person by observing what he or she does verses listening to what they say. A person who shows inconsistencies from what they say and what they do is not a person to be trusted.

I think another mistake we make is convincing ourselves that we have to have a certain person. This is a fatal mistake because it leads to obsession and hang ups.

The reality is that any caring, respectful, and mature person can be a quality romantic partner. Now, the question is are we caring, respectful, and mature.

Before we go out to find what we want we have to know what we want, how to get it, and how to deal with things when they do not work out the way we wanted them to.

The people that take advantage of us do so because we are compromising our desires to quickly. We should make them earn our company. Moreover, if they will not perform to our standards, we should be strong enough to cut them loose.

We do not do them any favors by staying around. We do not do us any favors by staying. Most people's reluctance to leave may be from the fear of pain. Separation brings about a lot of pain.

However, what is it exactly we are loosing. How much can a person who does not talk, is not affectionate, and ignores us really worth?

Now, the reality may be that you are married to such a person and you may even have kids. I am not advising any one to get a divorce.

My philosophy for people in a bad marriage is for them to get counseling. If one person is mature, responsible, and has a good attitude about romance while the other person does not them it is up to the person who does value life to make the necessary decision to defend his or her joy, happiness, and comfort in life.

I even tell some women to use the good for nothing dummy. If you are in a bad marriage and find that leaving would provide you hardship because you do not have the means to earn enough to take care of your self and may even your kids, well stay till you get a college degree.

When you graduate, leave.

Now some may say that this is harsh. If you have ever found your self in a relationship with selfish person that only cares about him or her self you would not say this is harsh.

The reality is that there are many immature people who do not have the mental faculties needed for a loving, caring, involved, and peaceful romance.

Our culture tells us to stay. However, it is unhealthy for people to be in a loveless relationship.

The only people that can defend us are we. Trust me that person is not going to change. When you leave, you will probably see a little child that goes through an emotional crisis and who denies that he or she is selfish and ungiving.

We owe to them to be completely honest. I hope that by us telling them what they are lacking they will grow up and treat their next partner better.

As for us we have to take a stand for what we want, be sure of what we want, use discipline is getting it, and do our part.

Every person in the relationship is responsible for the nature of the relationship.