Our ugly truth is that we have become very cruel people. Most of us are anti-neighbor. We are constantly looking for flaws in other people so we can condemn them.

In addition, we practice the science of dirty and judgmental looks.

I state this points because before we can begin to live a better life we have to be willing to see our true nature.

All of us have serious problems. Only you know what your behavioral challenges are in your life.

It is my hope that you have an honest interest in living a peaceful, tranquil, and comfortable life.

In order for this to happen, you have to free your self from the stress of fear and guilt.

Most of what we think of our neighbor is what we think of ourselves. In no way can a person really know another person after a ten second observation of their neighbor.

Who can read minds? Therefore, since we cannot read minds it stands to reason that those quick evaluations of our neighbor are really our own subconscious evaluation of ourselves.

Here I am talking about those quick judgments of people when we see them at the bank, mall, street, grocery store, and any other place we encounter strangers in our every day life.

Again, the point here is that there is no way to read minds and that quick judgments-regardless of the subconscious cues that drive them-cannot be true because no one can read minds and there is not information to truly know the person’s true nature.

I say that this practice of judging our neighbor is more and exercise of our dissatisfaction with our life.

By neighbor, I mean any person that is not friend or family. Friends and family members are evaluated through our interaction with them over time.

The point of this essay is our truthful evaluation through introspection. Introspection is an inward evaluation of us.

We have to sit down and go through all our behaviors to see where the problems are in us.

There are reasons why we do what we do.

I see the following behaviors plaguing people:
1. Angst from lack of purpose.
2. Sadness.
3. Depression.
4. Frustration.
5. Anger.
6. Psychotic behaviors (road rage, abuse of children, meanness towards spouse, i.e. etc).
7. Violation of personal morality.
8. Inability to acquire pleasure from a romantic relationships.
9. Inability to make and hold friendship.
10. Childish and irresponsible behavior( criticizing co-workers fighting with mangers and supervisors and loosing jobs because of behavior problems).

I see all human behavior as a result of four reasons.

A. Inappropriately learned behaviors.
B. Physical Illness
C. Mental Illness
D. Bad Attitude.

When we are evaluating our behavior, the goal should not be to torture ourselves or begin the practice of self-loathing.

True change takes time, patience, and self-appreciation.

The important thing to keep in mind is that in order to change we must first identify the problem.

If we know the problem then we have to start working on exercises that will lead to permanent change.

The following essay will be on the causes of behavior. Then I will deal with exercises for change.